The Voice

 Husbands and wives interchanging and intersecting roles and responsibilities is Partner supporting Partner. The new ideology called women supporting women and men supporting men is touching. It is a honorable mindset for partner to support partner.  There are billion reasons to do this, because this is one person you are forever tied with and it would be in your best interest to watch his/her back. Husbands, It's not enough to provide her daily needs, you need to support her dreams, vision and make her goals realisable. Wives, it's not enough to be home makers, you need to be spiritually, emotionally and financially available and supportive, as physical availability is not enough. We need to make his leadership and kingship an easy and a fulfilling journey for him and us. Let's learn to do more, and beyond what society, culture and religion expect from us. Let's act in the interest of both parties. We would forever be greater than I, both in quantity and in quality, as...

If you are not already in a relationship, don't rush in, and if you already in, don't rush out. There is nothing new under the sun. Even The Heavens had a touch of earth in it, when one of the angel wanted to be like God. No matter how heaven on earth our relationship or marriage is, it would have a touch of earth in it and we should never see situations as absurd as long as it's not life threatening or abnormal.  You will agree with me that the way we perceive situations are different and sometimes not the exact way they are in reality. There are some perceptions error at play most times, which means that we should not rush to conclude on our partner, and not rush out of what is already working or will eventually work.  Let's learn to give it our best, and be open to see the 360 degree angle to that matter and situation. Also let's endeavor to give him/her a hundred percent chance to work things out. Be very sure that when you want to walk out of it, that nothing e...

It is risky to let the most important person in your life feel less important. Their place should not be replaceable nor competitive. Family are what and who would be left when others have gone, so don't downplay their position.  Many are alone and lonely today because they do not have a good balance and right placement of knowing where people, things and activities belong. Some are suffering from the wrong application or  none application of this principle. We should learn the balance in prioritizing people over things, activities, places and positions. Our Needs should be separated from our wants.  In Abraham Maslow's Hierarchy of needs, need for family, friendship, and connection to others comes third after you have food, shelter and  feel safe. It's a need and not just a need to come last, rather should come first, as long as we are physically safe. We should seek work-Life balance as well as We should always come before I, because two is greater than one. #Famil...

One thing to do in order to oil and m oisturise our relationship is to always find a perfect moment to make a strong point. When your partner is weak of any sort (physical, financial, mental), you can show up your strength for him/her at such time, because it's such moment that he places his highest value on strength and that is not the time to deny him such.  When your partner offends you in an unimaginable way, such is the perfect time for you to find it in you to forgive. At such times, she think she is underserving of your forgiveness and if you truly can brace up and bring yourself up to it, you have made the strongest of point. Meaning he might never be able to recover from that kindness, by holding you far too dear.  True love is only known when it's the hardest to show, and known in the most difficult moments and not the rosy times we all think we love. The test of love can only be passed when you find it the hardest to love, yet you love anyways. it's when it cost ...

As simple and insignificant a waiter's or a cleaner's job may appear in the work place, the need for them can not be ignored. It is because they serve a need and a purpose that makes them "a can't do without". There was a time I had an 8am class to lecture, the class was on hold for the cleaner to do her job, which took almost 30 mins of my lecture time, yet I can't help not to. In order to be recognised, respected and relevant in our relationships and marriage, our presence must be serving a need and purpose. No one should occupy space for nothing. No one want to lose any part of their body, either seen or unseen, little or big. The reason is because every part of the body has a function they serve, even to the toes and fingers. Also, you would be respected and cherished when you serve a function or a purpose in the other person's lives. Has anyone ever being in a situation that you wish you had a longer nails? Because it has its importance and when the n...

DIFFERENCE is an addition. No matter the similarity you share with your partner, there would always be difference between you too. So don't expect all similarities and no difference. The law of creation pattern after the law of difference. Though He made us all in his image and likeness, yet He made us Male and Female. Though we are joint Heir with Christ, He told one to love and the other to submit (difference). He made one from the dust and the other from the rib, though we are both human. Whoever you end up with, you must sure learn to enjoy your differences. Your likes, dislike, hobbies, favourite place, values, personal culture, and more will be different, no matter how similar they seems. You need not to work yourself out trying to make another person be like you or do your thing. As long as there is a meeting point, make do with it and learn to enjoy the difference.  You should be able to accept the fact that though your children look alike, they are not the same. They are d...

If you don't want to be replaced, then you have to be rightly placed. The Gap you refuse to fill, another would soon fill up the space. There are no vacum in life.  In marriage, if you stop being the best friend to your spouse, another would (even opposite sex). In parenting, if you won't give a listening ear, and be a true support system to your children, their peers would soon be that support. I had some friends at the time, we were extremely close, but distance created a gap. We innocently refused to bridge the gap with a call, text, chat, voice note, or anything. At some point, we struggled to get back to what we were before, even though the interest was there. I had another friend, we haven't seen in 6 years, yet there was a deposit however little. She either check my status (a silent way of check up), or like my post or I send a voice note or pictures. We did something. And the time we saw, no one would believe we have been ways apar...