Relationship Building Block: Intention Check

One would do a medical check up to understand one's state of health. At other times, we check up our account balance to make some financial decisions. We need to always conduct an intention check on our spouses and any form of relationships. This would prevent a lot of misunderstanding, conflict, distrust, disagreement, misjudging, jealousy one might likely be facing.

The solution to some wrong patterns and deeds of our partner sometimes, is to understand why they did it and that would help us to know what to do to help. Intention check is not a way to justify people's wrong, it's just a way to remain human, show empathy, express emotional intelligence and make our relationship lifelong.

There was a day I was having a conversation with my husband and I said something that he misunderstood. It pained me so much and I thought to myself, if he had listened to the motives behind those words, and tuned his mind to my intentions. He would have seen, I was talking and acting in the best interest of him and our marriage. I had also fallen short of same, where I took his word wrongly when he meant no harm, till he explained and re-explained for me to get his true intention.

These are needless pains we bear, because we are too impatient to listen out to what our partner is not saying, beyond what he/she is saying. I recently walked away from a friendship when she broke our business tie without an open conversation. I then thought to myself, what if, what she said wasn't really her intentions? or what if that was a word from her to call my attention to her unspoken thought and feelings. I lost a beautiful thing because I couldn't pay the price to check her intentions.

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